This was the size of my Melanoma.

To many SoCal residents, if the sun is out that can only mean one thing, heading outdoors to soak up the rays! This was true for me too. Since as young as I can remember, my friends and I would spend countless hours in the sun on any hot summer day. Southern California is the perfect playground for beach goers and outdoorsy people alike. I would often think that my day was wasted if I had spent the better part of it indoors while the sun was out.

Since junior high, I have always liked to have that sun-kissed beach tan. I used to lay out in my backyard or even just pop the screen off my bedroom window and climb out on the roof of the house for that perfect tan. When I entered high school, tanning salons started to pop up everywhere. You were almost certain to find a tanning salon in almost every other strip mall. After my first tanning salon experience, I was hooked. I couldn’t believe that I was able to achieve a deep rich tan in just 10 minutes! No more baking in the sun for hours, I was now able to relax underneath those pretty purple lights with a fan blowing to keep me from sweating, and music blaring through the headphones in my ears. Shortly after that first experience, I found myself tanning frequently. Rain or shine, a weekly tan sesh was in order. Now lets be real for a minute, at 16 years of age, of course I knew that tanning probably wasn’t the best for my skin and that those ever so convenient beds were much worse than the actual rays of the sun. There were WARNING articles in almost every teen magazine I read, but at that age you think you are invincible. I sure did.

After my college years I became quite the world traveler and desired to vacation anywhere tropical. While on vacay, I spent most of the time tanning on a beach or lying out by the pool. Never wore sun screen. Instead, I rubbed large amounts of tanning oil and even baby oil all over my body and even my face to maximize my time spent in the sun. My family always warned me about tanning and the harm it could do to my skin, “it would only be a matter of time” they would say. Still I thought the darker the better. In fact, the only thing I ever really worried about were moles for vanity reasons alone. They are hereditary in my family. Truth is, I didn’t really care for the way they looked and after each summer I realized that my body would develop these not so glamorous spots quite rapidly. Still it did not stop me.

Years flew by and I became just a little more aware of the changes my skin had been going through. One year I noticed this one particular mole on my leg becoming slightly larger and darker than the rest. I scheduled an appointment to get the opinion of a dermatologist. I wasn’t all that scared or worried but wanted the peace of mind knowing that little brown spot was okay. This particular doctor suggested that we biopsy the mole to see if it checked out alright. Days later, lab results were in and the mole had some a-typical cells. (Not cancer though). Back into the doctor’s office I went for minor surgery to have the surrounding skin removed. The whole procedure took less than 15 minutes, I was stitched up and on my merry way. I recall asking the doctor if I should be worried about other moles on my body but she did not seem concerned. In fact, her only recommendation was to wear sunscreen from that point forward. Easy enough!

At 25 I guess you can say I grew up a bit and began to pay even closer attention to the amount of sun I exposed myself to (although I didn’t stay out of the sun completely). One thing was for sure though, I STOPPED going to tanning salons. What I didn’t know was that the damage had already been done. Over the next 3 years I made it a part of my morning regimen to perform a quick body scan of the other 50 plus moles on my body. (Seriously, I have a lot of those little guys). Whenever I would see one changing in size, color, or shape I’d pick up that phone to schedule yet another appointment to have it checked out. I would purposely see different dermatologists to make certain I was receiving various opinions. Yet, none of those doctors seemed to be alarmed by anything. All checked out okay, every time.

Fast forward three more years, now I’m 28, I was doing some late night packing to get ready for yet another vacation and days before leaving I could not help but notice that this mole on my chest was in fact changing. (I had actually noticed it all summer). It was seriously no larger than the size of a pencil eraser but that perfect circular shape it once had was gone. It was also much darker than before and appeared to look smudged. I went back into the docs office and was told, “You are a little paranoid. The mole in question does not look like anything concerning. Neither did any of the other moles you questioned the last few years.” I recall feeling just as the doctor described me, “paranoid.” So I left on vacation but I gotta tell you, I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach that that mole needed to come off! I thought about it every day on vacation. I wanted it removed from my body for my own peace of mind. After all, I was the one who kept a close eye on the mole and I knew for a fact it had changed.

When I returned from vacation you best bet I made an appointment and this time I demanded it to be taken off. I recall being told, “You are still very young and there is no need to scar up your body if you don’t have to.” I (not so politely) replied, “What is wrong with you doctors? I am paying for insurance; I want it off, just take the darn thing off!” After insisting multiple times, the mole was removed. Dr. Nguyen looked at me and said, “I’ll send it to the lab and you will probably be alerted via email of the results. I will only call you personally if I have bad news.”

Exactly 7 days had passed and one afternoon I received a phone call. It was Dr. Nguyen. The same doc that told me I was “paranoid” was on the other end of the phone telling me that the results came back and “the mole was a Melanoma.” The next thing he said was, “we need to get you back in for surgery as soon as possible since this is quite serious.” Without hesitation I said, “Okay when?” We scheduled an appointment for the following week. Dr. Nguyen told me that he hopes to be able to remove the cancer with minor surgery but if for some reason the cancer had spread to my lymph nodes, we would need to discuss chemo and radiation treatments. The call ended as quickly as it began and I remember standing in my kitchen trembling. I picked the phone back up to dial my mom’s phone number and could barely hold the phone in my hands. My body was shaking uncontrollably. Once my mom answered the phone I tried to repeat what I had just been told but instead I broke down crying. After a few minutes, I was finally able to express to her the reason for all the tears. My mom told me everything would be okay and we promised to talk more tomorrow.

As I sat alone in my living room, I had a TON of mixed emotions. Naturally, I felt scared for the inevitable but I was also quite angry. Could you imagine if I had been the kind of patient who took the doctors word and did not insist on having the mole removed? Eventually, I could have lost my life over that mistake. I’m so thankful I took matters into my own hands. I also recall feeling pity for myself. Why me? How could this happen? I’m so young. I am going to lose my hair through chemo. I hate to admit I had these thoughts but it’s the honest truth.

Well the following week I was admitted for surgery. The whole procedure was performed while I lay awake on the table. The doctor and nurse made me feel extremely comfortable and although I wasn’t able to feel a thing, they talked me through the whole process. Within 30-40 minutes I was out the door. Results came back days later…all the melanoma was removed. No more cancer cells existed on my chest. What a relief!

Although, I know my days in the sun are over (which at times makes me sad), I am beside myself with joy and gratitude that I am still here and healthy. I thank God almost every day for a second chance. I will not take this precious life for granted and I have decided to spread the word about skin cancer. Although, a high percentage of skin cancer is treatable and curable (if detected early) it is nothing to be taken lightly. That gorgeous sun is so incredibly harmful to our skin and that “sun-kissed tan” simply isn’t worth all the damage it does. So I encourage you to cover up, wear sunscreen, hats, sunglasses, protective clothing, and continue to do whatever it takes to make sure you are cancer free!